My new blog home (sort of)

I found a new blog home! It's prettier, it's brighter and some of you may be familiar with it. I'll be writing all of my future posts here:

http://hkweighin.blogspot.com/

(just click on the above link to go to my new blog)

So long old blog, it's been a great ride!

Missing RM

RM has been at his new job for almost two weeks and for the most part, he likes his job. He found work in his career field and is excited that there are new things that he's learning from his new job. I just wish that he worked closer and not 2 1/2 hours away from home. I see RM only once during the week and on weekends- at least our reunions are sweet!

Aunt Sue asked me last week if there was anything positive that I saw from RM being unemployed. It was a great question and though it was a stressful time, he was able to help me out with things that I could not have done without him:

- He was available to scratch my back- night & day. No more rubbing my back against a corner wall!

- It was nice having company while I ran errands.

- I slept in every morning while RM got up, fixed Moe's breakfast, and took him to school.

- No more 5 am gym workouts, when you're unemployed you can work out after 8am!

- RM saw what I do on a day to day basis at home, and really appreciated everything I do to run our home efficiently. He's always been appreciative, but when he saw it first hand- it made a big difference.

- We laughed a lot.

- We cranked up the music...and danced. I still have fun when I dance by myself, but slow dances are more enjoyable when you have a partner, and this time- I let him do the leading.

- RM helped Moe complete his Scouts Eagle project!!!! Four months ago, Moe still needed to complete several merit badges and a huge Eagle project to plan. During RM's two month unemployment, they were able to complete the remaining merit badges and Moe's Eagle Project. (will post about Eagle project with pictures later)

RM and I have always had a close relationship, but we drew even closer. It's no wonder I miss him so much.

God's Love

I have to admit that the past few weeks I've been struggling with some anger and started to question why our family was going through such a difficult time.

I couldn't understand why one woman's pregnancy was saved after receiving a blessing from her husband.

And mine wasn't.

About 4 years ago RM was unemployed and it took over a year for him to find employment. I felt that since our family underwent a tough period that somehow RM would never be laid off.

It was a naive thought- RM was laid off from work 2 months ago.

It was extremely overwhelming dealing with grief over my miscarriage and the fear of being unemployed and not knowing how long it would last. I haven't worked in a "real" job in over 10 years, so I started to become discouraged that with every phone call I made to job agencies- they would tell me that most employers were looking for someone with "more recent experience."

I wanted to "throw in the towel" until I read an article titled "Love and Law" by Elder Dallin H. Oaks from my church magazine. After reading and pondering the message, I finally understood and stopped being angry.

The article helped me to realize that though no earthly power could save my pregnancy- only a divine power could save me in my grief, and help me overcome my fear.

I find it amazing that after I found peace- RM got the good news that he starts his new job this Thursday.

Though I still cry at times over the loss of my baby- I find acceptance, hope and I know that God loves me.

Our Early Easter Basket

My Aunt Sue lives a few hours away from me, and last Friday she came up for a day to take me out to lunch. She came in to the house holding an Easter basket with one hand, and the other hand holding a bag of books for me to read.

After she placed the items on my kitchen counter she gave me a hug, after we pulled away, she asked me, "So how are you holding up?"

I immediately started to cry and tell her how I really felt, and Aunt Sue was a great sport letting me whine. It was the first time that I felt l didn't have to sound brave or positive.

We spent the next several hours just sitting, talking and eating. The only downside of the visit was when it had to end- it was time for Aunt Sue to drive back.

It was 6 hours of visiting, and I know we could have spent another 6 hours of talking, and never run out of things to talk about.

I wish everyone had an Aunt Sue in their life.

Easter has not arrived, yet all the items in this Easter basket that Aunt Sue brought, are all gone...

- Chocolate marshmallow bunnies and Cadbury eggs have been consumed by RM and Moe.

- RM and Moe saw the Weight Watcher mini bars and they assumed it wouldn't be good. I made a funny face when I bit into them and pretended they weren't great. I wanted the WW mini bars all to myself- they're delicious!

- Costco cash card is safely tucked away in my wallet.

- RM took an immediate liking to the toy duck that makes quaking noises and preceded to quack and walk like a duck - free entertainment!

- Moe played with the plastic ball filled with glitter that lights up every time you bounce it- he used our dining table to bounce the ball...with plates of food still on! He cleaned up the mess.

It was an Easter Basket enjoyed by every member of our family.

Thanks Aunt Sue!

Lemon Loaf

It's rare for me to find a recipe where I don't make some changes. When you have a family with a sensitive digestive system and and a picky palette- you learn to make adjustments. The recipe for this lemon loaf was no exception, except the original recipe I found to be too dry and not moist enough.

After baking a few loaves and not satisfied with the result- I came up with this recipe that I was very happy with.

Ingredients:
-2 cups flour
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 3 eggs, room temp
- 1 cup sugar
- 2 tablespoons butter softened
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 ½ teaspoon lemon extract
- 1/3 cup lemon juice
- ½ cup oil
- ½ cup sour cream
ICING
- 1 cup powdered sugar
- 1 tablespoon powdered sugar
- 2 tablespoons milk
- 1/2 teaspoon lemon extract

1. Preheat oven to 350. Grease and flour a 9 x 5 loaf pan.
2. In a large bowl, combine flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt.
3. In a medium bowl, combine eggs, sugar, butter, vanilla extract, lemon extract and lemon juice with a mixer until blended.
4. Pour wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and blend until smooth. Add oil and mix well.
5. Pour into loaf pan and bake for 45 minutes until toothpick comes out clean. Remove from oven and cool in pan on a rack.
6. Making the icing: In a small bowl, combine powdered sugar, milk and lemon extract with a mixer until smooth.
7. When loaf is cooled, remove from pan and frost top with icing. When icing has set, slice loaf into slices (should get about 8 good slices).

Cooks Note: For a zestier lemon taste, grind about 1 to 2 tsp of lemon peel. If you want a thick layer of icing, wait about every 5-10 minutes before you put another layer of icing until you get the desired thickness. RM likes his icing very thick, but I got tired after 3 layers. The picture below is how the icing looks with only 3 layers of icing, the icing is very thin which is why you want to keep layering the icing.


This is another family favorite except for Moe- he's allergic to lemons!

Smile

Since last December, it seems that our family has been heaped with one trial after another. There are days when it's hard to find something to smile about until I read this beautiful song from Charlie Chaplin:

Smile,
though your heart is aching
Smile,
even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
you'll get by
If you smile
through your fear and sorrow
Smile
and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through
for you
Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near
That’s the time you must keep on trying
Smile
what’s the use of crying
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile
If you’ll just

Smile

And then you're reminded that no matter what you're going through....there is always something to smile about.

(comments off)

Roughing it

Last weekend Moe went on a camping trip to Dillon Beach with the youth boys in our ward/church. He was excited about going and we were excited to have a weekend to ourselves at the house.

The weather forecast for the weekend was overcast and heavy raining. So, I packed extra towels and soap. When I tried to put in a toothbrush and toothpaste- Moe stopped me.

"Mom, you do realize that I'm not going to have time to brush my teeth in the morning."

I instantly shuddered and replied, "That's disgusting- you don't want to go around with morning breath."

"It's calling roughing it". "When you're out camping with the guys- no one cares about morning breath and trust me, no one is going to bother brushing their teeth or taking a shower." And then Moe proceeds to take out the extra towel and soap from his backpack.

It was hard to shake the image of Moe going through out the day with cotton mouth, so I made him promise to stop at the convenience store and buy gum or Altoids.

Moe rolls his eyes and says, "Yes, mom." I feel like I've won a small victory.

"Do you think you could at least just wipe yourself down before you go to bed?" "You'll feel so much better and get a better sleep if you do."

Moe gives me this exasperated look, and I know that no matter how much I try to convince him about the merits of cleanliness, on a camping trip- it wall fall on deaf ears.

When Moe came home after his trip, he was exhausted, but had a great time fishing, crabbing, sand surfing, building beach fires, and they played a version of hot potato, but with a live crab.

The game was short lived because someone is a tad scared of crabs and when the crab came to him- he spiked the poor crab into the sand, ending the game. I won't say who that person is, but he looks a lot like RM. Shhhhhh...

(Moe pictured with one of his church youth leaders, Brad B.)

Moe and RM wants to go camping by the beach as a family trip.
Of course, I'll go with them as long as we go in a RV equipped with a bed and shower.

And I definitely will not be "roughing it"....I'm brushing my teeth.