Wednesday, April 8, 2009

A letter of Mercy from H.K.'s husband, Renaissance Man

This is Renaissance Man, H.K.'s husband. Since I have the next few days off, I thought H.K. should take a break from blogging. It's my turn now.

I'm grateful that H.K. cooks for us. She's a great cook. I'm especially grateful that she works hard for Moe and I to eat healthy. I do have one complaint, actually several:

Why does she keep changing our favorite recipes? Why does she have to put a new "twist" to them? Leave my Cream of Mushroom Chicken alone!

I want my chocolate chip cookies plain! I don't want oatmeal in them. I don't want some fancy dark chocolate chips in there. Please no more gluten free flour. I like my gluten, leave them in there!

Why do you insist on making spaghetti, when you know they give me heart burns? We have been married for 18 years, you should know that by now! I know you love spaghetti, you tell me that all the time. But, don't you feel the slightest remorse when Moe and I are popping antacids like they're candy? I don't care how many times you try different variations of spaghetti, they're all the same, and they still give me heart burns!

I admire that you try new recipes. You have helped to expand both me and Moe's palette. I think we're both good sports for trying them out. Honey, I'm begging you. Pleeaassse if you really love us, leave our favorite recipes alone!

Your loving husband,
Renaissance Man
p.s. What's for dinner?

21 comments:

Kristina P. said...

I wish my husband would write this kind of post about me! Unfortunately, it would be not as nice.

The Crazy Coxes said...

I say Cream of Mushroom chicken for a week!!!

Tammy said...

You are too funny RM. My husband begs for me not to experiment at all. He pops the tums before the meals begin at our house...hey...it's not done until the fire alarm goes off!! LOL!!

septembermom said...

Funny post RM! You would get along well with my husband. He's always nervous when he sees me trying something new in the kitchen. Maybe you'll be surprised by one of H.K.'s new versions of a recipe. It may become one of your favorites:)

♫ Spasm ♫ said...

LMBO

Wendy said...

OATMEAL CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES SOUND YUMMY!!

Melinda said...

My husband is just happy if I cook at all. But he'll eat anything--ANYTHING--so its different! Too funny!

nikkicrumpet said...

LOL nothing is for dinner now!!! Unless you're cooking it lol. Don't you know to never ever insult the cook! But I hate it when somebody messes with perfection...I totally get it!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

That was funny...my husband doesn't care that much for spaghetti either...but yet I keep making it!

Maybe I should LISTEN to him? lol!

mbkatc230 said...

This was great! Hey, I made chicken wings last night that were marinated in PB, grape jelly, red wine vinegar and hot sauce. Didn't tell hubby what they were made with until he'd eaten about 8 and loved em! HA HA. Kathy

CDB said...

Yum... now HK has to post the Cream of Mushroom chicken recipe. (: This was sweet.. to give her a 'break'. Though it sounds to me as if she's pretty busy cooking!

Midwest Mommy said...

Are you sure my hubs didn't write this, lol.

peewee said...

Hmmm...daring post. Looks like you might be gettin' top ramen noodles for dinner tonight.

Beth said...

At my house, this would be me begging my husband to not fiddle with some of the recipes. 'Cept he is the one popping antacids.

I think it is nice that H.K. cooks. You could have been stuck with me. And that would mean a whole lot of cereal nights.

H.K. said...

This is RM - Thanks for all the comments. H.K. has taken pity on me and will no longer touch my cream of mushroom chicken!

Mother Goose said...

ok, i decided to read this new blog nikicrumpet and her post lead me to your post! I'm hooked~!

I love your husbands take. He is quite funny and I love that he will BLOG! I think Renaissance Man and Mr. Incredible would get along GREAT!!! Seriously, I can hear my husband saying the same thing but he WON'T BLOG, dangit!

and umm... yeah don't you care it gives them heart burns?? rofvlrfolrfol, I'll be pokin' around.

the eternal worrier said...

Hey RM. Your post has made me feel hungry. Bacon sandwiches for tea I’m thinking...

Sassy said...

First of all I love that your hubby RM made a post.....that's awesome! HMMMMMMMMM........I hear ALL the time from my kids...STOP TRYING NEW RECIPE'S!!!! They want the same ol' same ol'....thankfully my hubby doesn't complain to me...he just won't eat it....but this man who HATES onions has been known to have gotten two slices of bread with a whole onion between them and don't tick me off then I put onions in every main dish...because I like them.....and I can chop onions till the cows come home...hahaha....and around here if they start buggin' me....POPCORN IS A HOT COOKED MEAL!!!!

wendy said...

That was cute --sounds JUST like my husband. Have they been talking??? I cant' do any "exciting" receipes as he'd freak out. Strictly a meat and potatoes kinda guy. Oh and Twinkies. I like spicy---different foods. You say your son plays football----my husband is a teacher and football coach at the high school he teaches at. Flash me an email and tell me where your son goes to school------
happy Easter

Jenners said...

Well, give the men what they want, I say! As an avowed noncook, I do the bare minimum. Why stress yourself out if you don't have to? But on the flip side, your wife is probably trying to be the best wife she can be and make you the best possible meal she can think of. Either than or she is bored of making the same old stuff. Or she loves to cook and wants to experiment. And please don't be too obnoxious about your guest post ... my husband was and it was terrible! : )

Sally said...

My husband wants to know if RM wants to unite with him to form a support group. He's angry that I substituted turkey bacon for full fat pig in one of his favorite recipes.